My First Thai Massage

By Becky, Premier Self Storage Burton

“So, my friend kindly bought me a voucher for a full body Swedish massage”eye emoji for 5 minute burtonisms

It was my birthday last week (happy birthday to me!) and one of my friends gave me, for my birthday, a voucher for a full body Swedish massage which was to be followed by a foot massage. I went along yesterday after work to spend an hour and a half getting pampered and this is how it went…

I walked in to be greeted by a lovely smiley lady who welcomed me into the shop. The décor was very ‘oriental’. There was also an aroma… it was a little bit like a Thai restaurant. If you closed your eyes you would’ve thought you were in Bangkok! (Unfortunately, when I opened my eyes I was still in sodding Burton)    smiling-face-with-open-mouth-and-tightly-closed-eyes

So she asked me to take my shoes off, at the bottom of the stairs, and put some slippers on, for some odd reason all their slippers were a size 14!  I looked up at this point after taking my shoes off,  and saw what can only be described as the mount Everest of stairs!  I was scared I’d topple over in my XXL clogs and break my neck just climbing the thing.5 minute burtonisms

She then led me up the stairs and down a corridor to a dark room. As I went in I was half expecting her to turn the lights on, but she didn’t. I then saw there was a mood light that changed colour and then realised that was the only light. The smell of aroma oils in the room was incredibly strong, if I had asthma I’d have been dead in minutes. Luckily for me, I don’t.

To start off it was lovely, and I started to relax until she started applying pressure trying to get my knots out and at that point, it became somewhat uncomfortable. Because I’d never had a massage before I didn’t know if that was what was meant to happen I thought; “no pain, no gain” and all that but in all honesty, I wasn’t enjoying it.

The funniest part for me was when she moved on to my legs. After rubbing them down with the oils, she patted me on the leg and at first it was as if she was saying “come on all done” as people do when they tell you they’re finished, but oh no, she was just getting started. She began chopping on my post-pregnancy legs like you wouldn’t believe… gosh, my legs made noises the most unholy noises that would literally horrify you. It made me question why anyone chooses to have children in the first place.

Anyway, after I got dressed and I then headed. Sorry, skied downstairs in my enormous slippers. Where I was then sat down for my foot massage which after the beating I got upstairs, I was actually looking forward to! I was made a herbal Thai tea and given a Thai brochure to read. It must have been my blonde hair and Burton accent that led them to think I could read Taiwanese?! Anyway, the poking of the toes was the most relaxing bit and I thoroughly enjoyed having my feet rubbed for half an hour whilst reading a bunch of Thai phrases!grinning-face-with-smiling-eyes



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